What Have You Done For A Tax Deduction This Year...

So this week marked the end of our week and a half long battle with the taxes until next year. Taxes are always a pain with my business and all. And myself being master accountant, I don't even balance my business check book for the year until April rolls around. It's my once-a-year checkbook balancing extravaganza. Good thing my husband actually is a master accountant and can turn the shady revenue/expenses excuse for a balance sheet I hand him into a wondrous piece of fill-in-the-fields art for the enjoyment of all the schmucks working for the man at the IRS.

Put all his hard paid off, because he had a thought. Albeit a stupid one, but it was a thought.

That night, after we had put in a full day of trying to get as much money out of the IRS as possible, he said to me, "Let's have another kid."

"What in the freakin world are you talking about?"

"Well, we would have gotten $2000 back from the IRS for the child tax credit," was his explanation.

"So, you want to spend thousands of dollars next year on food, diapers, hospital bills, clothes, car seats and whatever else babies require these days for a measly $2000 tax credit?" was my reply.

"We'd hardly spend any money. The baby could wear all of Kaydn Rye's clothes, use all his old stuff, and we'd get $2000 out of the deal."

"Yeah, that's how it works. This magical cash cow of a baby won't require any new stuff and will only eat Kaydn Rye's regurgitated food for nourishment, so it won't require any food, any clothes or any diapers..."

I wasn't being roped into that like I was the first time. And I have had four years to work on arguing my point in support of more pets over children.

If he had his way we'd be on some TLC show with 18 kids, me in a mumu and all of us living in Arkansas.

I always wonder how those crazy baby making people remember all those kids' names. I saw a clip recently of the mom on that one show, whatever her name is, Lillie May, Sally Sue, something like that, telling the camera guy about how her exercise routine consists of simply keeping up with the "little ones." She started going down the list of their names and after two or three she just finally gave up.

I do the same thing with the dog already (if you don't know Gertie, you need to read this blog more often, see Gertie, our old Chinese man). Gertie has to sit and beg before she gets anything, and Kaydn Rye has to say please and thank you before he gets anything, and it is not difficult to get the two confused. Like when Gertie needs water (like she can't wait a day or two until I'm not busy), she has to sit on her butt until I say, but on a few occasions it has been known to go down like this, "Gertie, what to you say?? What do you say?"

I then remember that she cannot speak and that she has no idea what I'm saying.

Or sometimes Kaydn Rye needs to "sit" before lunch will be served. Or just the other day I was yelling at Kaydn to come so I could put him in the dog kennel.

So needless to say, we won't be needing a conversion van anytime soon to cart around our 18 kids, all just for the tax credits.




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